We all have them. We all fight against them and then, from time to time, we give in to them. I understand that. What I don’t get is when we give in to the ones that cost so much, in terms of relationships and how they are affected. I get that we all have our personal demons to fight and stress will cause one to try to soothe the soul of those demons. But what makes one cross a line that has never been crossed before? Or risk so much for a temporary fix to the struggle?
Deep thoughts today, I know. But I am struggling and thinking deeply on these things. I am trying not to be angry. I am trying to rise above the inner gut feelings of reaction. I don’t know that I will be able to this time around. So many thoughts, so many hurts. How do I move past this?
I don’t know. All I have is prayer. Nothing else will help. Nothing else will fix this but God. I can’t do it in my own strength. But I won’t let it defeat me and beat me down. I can’t. I am needed.